well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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