Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number

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(443): View more from Maryland

This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(407): View more from Florida

A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.

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(760): View more from California

They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?

(1-601): View more from Mississippi

She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.

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(831): View more from California

i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing

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