There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
i out mim tonsoeep
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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