Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
well you can't waste a boner
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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