I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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