Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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