Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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