wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize