Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
