So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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