Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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