yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You can't just leave with hair like that
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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