I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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