.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I have tasted many bathrooms
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
