is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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