I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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