similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
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You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
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C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...