Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.