Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize