He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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