I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
