No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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