32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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