omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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