i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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