I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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