Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
