you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
50% drunk capacity currently
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
