why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
