In America we eat man semen.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Randomize