i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
