Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
