Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize