Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She announced her abortion via fbk
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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