last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
