if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
