This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
