Life is so much better after having sex.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
