i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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