Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
okay pat passed out under dana's car
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
tonight lets celebrate not being married
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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