I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Enjoy the penises