Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
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Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
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Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.