im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
is that a dick in a sweater?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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