so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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