Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
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