Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
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bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
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His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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