he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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