rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize