Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I will pee on everything he values.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
