i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
home. puking in laundry basket.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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