After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
